End of an era

When I was younger, I remember walking through the halls of the Galleria Crystal Run in Middletown. It was mesmerizing, with bright lights, signs promising sales, aromas of pretzels and fast food teasingly wafting through, and racks upon racks of clothes. The pet store always promised a depressed dog sitting behind the glass, at once becoming excited after seeing a face on the other side. It was pretty much the best place ever.

Over the summer, I once again walked through the wide set hallways, watching as hurried shoppers passed by the closed down Disney store and instead of smiling characters turning in their window display, cheap sports regalia hung on steel hangers. The pet store closed too, just a blank, white wall reminding those who remembered of the animals that used to roam inside. Empty stores featured odd advertisements in the windows asking customers to just walk a little further.

It makes me wonder about malls today. The Galleria is just one of a few that seem to envelop a museum like haunt, such as the Vallco Fashion Park in Cupertino. As I walked through the seemingly endless corridors, cheesy 80s Muzak playing softly on the overhead microphones, it made me sad to think of what that place could have (and probably had) been. The big stores, such as Macy's, JC Penney, Victoria's Secret, and Sears, stood tall against their tiny neighbors. But still, as loud as their names screamed, they still looked sad, without many customers seeping in or out of their doors.

As I returned my nephew's clothes at JC Penney, I noticed the bored employees, the barely mussed up folded clothes, the giant sales signs. Granted, it was around 12pm on a Monday afternoon, but still, it was eery.

Stores with unrecognizable second hand names promised children's shoes, perfumes, and quality jewelry. The familiar pretzel store stood waiting for me.

These situations just beg the question: What is happening to malls? Are they dying out, losing their touch? Or is it a sign of the economy and consumer's unwillingness to buy as much?

According to MSN Money in an article from last year, "The pain of a dying mall is far reaching."

It's crazy to think about how life will be without malls. They were always such a social staple for teenagers. It was the thing to do on the weekends before we all went off to live our separate lives. Even in college, it was something we'd do when we were bored, and even that mall, which seemed to be in a lot better shape than those mentioned above, had its fair share of closings.

I don't know what's going to happen. I don't know if this will turn around or if they will cease to exist, but it's something that may very well become a possibility.

Good news on the job front!

I've been whittled down into a small group of finalists for a reporter job in Utah that sounds like my cup of tea. In the small metropolitan area of Logan, I would be writing about community issues and city government. The paper, according to the editor I spoke with over the phone, is a great opportunity for a start-up job and there seems to be enough security in the job which means I wouldn't have to worry about being laid off anytime soon. However, the indecisive voice inside me keeps nagging. During this tough economic time, do I even have the option to be choosy when it comes to a first job?

I shouldn't be too hasty. After all, the official choice has not been made-I may in fact not get the position-but my head is constantly swimming with questions and what should and shouldn't be priorities.

One important aspect I've been thinking about is the fact that I need benefits. We all know too well that I need them. Accident prone and clumsy are just two words that have been used to describe me and I constantly get sick all year long. I can't keep living without any sort of insurance. It seems like a bad move.

Two. I'm stuck between two coasts. I clearly remember when I was in high school, dreaming about just leaping and going where the wind took me. But that was before I had a really solid support system. Both halves of that support system are on two halves of the country, which means I'd have to create an entirely new one in Utah. That idea sounds scary and I don't know how to decide what is more important to me. Do I accept a job that sounds utterly perfect yet the location doesn't seem ideal?

The pay is something that has been universal in all the job prospects I've come across. Starting out as a reporter, I am expected to make about $20,000 a year, which is fine. I can totally do that. That's more money than I've ever made in my life, combined. I could handle it, and in Logan, Utah, the cost of living is low enough where I could get by all right.

So how does one decide something as important as this? I'm not sure. It's something I'm sure I'll be faced with more than once in my job search. How does one handle this sort of pressure?

Growing up-When?

When do we hit the point where we have our lives figured out? Ever since I can remember, I used to look at adults and think, one day, I'm going to be like them. It seemed like a simple formula that you just grew to know, yet I feel like I didn't study the right cards.

I'm realizing now that the people who looked so secure when I was younger probably weren't. Maybe this struggle is lifelong, and that idea scares me. It's really difficult trying to break out on your own, and I think it's something that many people forget and ignore. It takes a lot of hard work to get to a point where you can sit back, relax, and look at your life with ease.

Just trying to work my way alone through a big city like San Francisco was hard enough. It became easier when I figured out what to do, but that momentary panic that pierced through me was enough to send me running. I'm getting older, yet I'm grasping onto the idea that I'm still a kid, and I don't know if that ever goes away. Do you always just feel like some clueless child for the rest of your life? I'm waiting for the day that I can proudly say I grew up. I'm hoping it comes soon.